I’m rarely asked why I chose not to have children. I’ll admit the idea of missing out on mum politics and a school run did disturb me but it passed. People I know have never felt the necessity to discuss the topic with me, probably because I didn’t. I recall reading a strident Polly Vernon, vehemently defending herself from the barrage of people who seemed to approach her daily, yes daily I tell you, to inquire as to her fertility choices. I’d hazard an educated guess that when faced with intensely personal issues, the stress comes not from others but more likely is a result of our unresolved selves. It’s somewhat far-fetched that your hairdresser, newsagent or the guy at the pub will constantly engage you with, “So what are you doing tonight? Thinking about having children?”

I’ve never had a change of heart. Barely eleven years old, I recall thinking to myself that I was never going to have children.

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The Advantages of Age

One evening, there were five women around 50 (one over 60) sitting in a hot tub… There was the buzz of laughter and celebration. And different points of view. Not to mention outrageous stories. We found ourselves discussing how great we felt. And how at odds that was to the prevalent media and societal narrative. We felt like communally rebelling about this depressing age story that gets told over and over again. This was not us nor our lives. We felt gloriously liberated by age and divested of the insecurities and doubts that plagued our younger years. We started Advantages of Age to challenge and dialogue about this. Please join us. Men too.